Parenting 2020- Part 2-Instruct vs Encourage
By Ms. Neha Mittal
# Ideal Parent
# Be the change to see the change for personal development
I often get stuck when I question myself how to become an Ideal parent? How to instill different qualities in my ward to cover all different aspects? I observe many kids around me with excellent academics and ethics. I compare and long for my ward to be rated at par.
I am an ordinary parent, stuck in helpless situations to react many times. Mostly we are occupied with these thoughts. The blog may help you with little steps to achieve what we want.
Normally we want our child to be intelligent, quick in response, understanding, logical, problem solving, possessing interpersonal skills, empathetic,Risk taker, highly confident, adaptable, jolly...and so on..a never ending list..
We need to understand the basic mindset of child which we may do by diving in our past. Reflecting on our weakness, strengths, fears, curiosities etc. Often it is observed present generation is not a good listener- so were we- A child learns best by his observation. Therefore we need to be careful what are presenting by our actions. Our actions are more impactful than our words. Rather than being instructive- we can be encouraging. Igniting their curiosity, leaving them to make independent decisions under our unobserved supervision.
Your “No” may always be heard as “Yes” to kids. Sometimes ignore though be an activity-oriented parent. Kids may not be willing to do the task given by us or may not do it the way we expect. How to make it possible-
-Try planning little rewards- offer their favorite dish/thing on completion of task.
- Plan little surprise outings as rewards.
- Try using some stick-on mentioning the tasks to be done on daily basis- Putting tick and cross for doing and not doing
This will also work as reminder for them.
- Give them some stickers pasted on refrigerator corner or their almirah to excite them to have multiple rows and columns of the same for every credits.
- Engage them in activities which are based on the output we expect- learning/ exploring/handling etc.
Example- A child who hates to draw or have lost confidence to start journey with Art. Suggest some magical youtube links to start drawing with just 1 letter or number to spread the magic. You will notice the results in 5 days. Child will not only explore more but will start talking about magic of letter and number.
Kids may focus on Excuses, we need to focus on reasons for ownership.
We need to stop excusing our children's bad behavior/words/actions. Our ignorance may penalize them later.
Preparing our children as assets or liabilities is our call.
Parenting is an art to get things done by kids so we can
If you are not tired, you aren't doing it right. Parents’ reaction can encourage or discourage kids. Don't worry that children never listen to you. Worry that they are watching you always.
It's worth it- if you feel it.
Be the change to see the change for personal development
Front Line Warrior
MCA, Banasthali Vidyapith, Tonk
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